Spiritually strong marriages do not occur naturally or accidentally. They require focused attention on obedience to God in the things He has required of us in marriage. Today, I’d like each married couple to think of the following three things. May they be a help to each of us as we strive to have spiritually strong marriages that glorify God.
1) Spiritually strong marriages are not the result of a couple being in agreement with each other but rather of being in agreement with God. Pop psychology teaches that a strong marriage is best accomplished when the marriage partners are operating in full agreement with each other. This teaching appears sound on the surface, but it has one major flaw in it. What if the couple is in agreement with each other about doing the wrong thing? Adam and Eve were in agreement about their sin, but the results of their sin were catastrophic for them and all who followed them. Spiritually strong marriages come when both partners are living in agreement with God. My goal in marriage should not be to persuade my wife to agree with me but to persuade her to agree with God.
2) Spiritually strong marriages are not marriages free from sin but marriages that are dealing with sin the right way. Because a marriage is made up of two fallen sinners, it is impossible to have a marriage without the presence of sin this side of heaven. Spiritually strong marriages are characterized by couples who have learned to identify and respond to sin in a Biblical way. This means that they have learned to confront sin, not cover it. They have learned to confess their sins against each other to God and to their spouses, and they have learned to forgive the other’s sins. Many problems exist within marriages simply because couples have a long-lasting pattern of unbiblical responses to sin within the marriage.
3) Spiritually strong marriages are not marriages where both spouses merely know the Word of God but a marriage where both spouses are applying the Word of God. Churches like ours are filled with couples who know the Word of God well! We can quote the pertinent passages and even give others good counsel from the Word of God. But spiritually strong marriages are not created just because the Word of God is known. Spiritually strong marriages occur when husbands and wives strive to diligently apply the Word of God to all areas of their lives and marriages.
Spiritually strong marriages are possible and worth striving for! I’m praying for God’s help for each of our marriages.